Ai-ai-ai-ai-ai!

You-you-you-you-you!

Uno! Dos! Tres! Quatro!

My teacher asked me where my homework was and that's when I told her
"No hablo Ingles"
Policeman caught me doing ninety and that's when he pulled me over
"No hablo Ingles"

A hippie with a tambourine asking me if I could spare a dollar
"No hablo Ingles"
Some douchebag at the club tries to pick a fight and grabs my collar
"No hablo Ingles"

(One! )
When I'm not feeling it!
(Two! )
When someone's full of shit!
(Three! )
When I get cut off at the ba-a-a-a-ar!

To make a getaway
It's all you've gotta say!
(Quatro! Sinco! Seis! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )

My nephew asked me if I'd take him to the Jonas Brothers movie
"No hablo Ingles"
Walking my dog I saw a sign that says to please pick up the doodie
"No hablo Ingles"
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/b/bowling+for+soup/no+hablo+ingles_20855360.html ]
My mama gets mad 'cause I never call my dad on his birthday
"No hablo Ingles"
A guy walks up and says "Donde esta casa de pepe"
... He no hablo Ingles

(One! )
So many different uses!
(Two! )
You don't need no excuses!
(Three! )
It's as easy as the third gra-a-a-a-ade!

The perfect getaway!
It's all you've gotta say!
(Quatro! Sinco! Seis! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )

Did you brush your teeth! ?
(No hablo Ingles! )
Where'd you leave your pants! ?
(No hablo Ingles! )
Did you feed the fish! ?
(No hablo Ingles! )
Do you like my band! ?
... Wait, don't answer that

"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"

Do you wanna buy some Girl Scout cookies?
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
Did one of you guys pee in the pool?
"No hablo Ingles!"

Hey! how 'bout we all get together and go to the ballet! ?
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
... Can I borrow that beer?
"No hablo Ingles!"

HAHAHAHAHAHA!
"No hablo Ingles!"
(Hey! Hey! Hey! )
"No hablo Ingles!"
"No hablo Ingles!"