She got a valentine from Gary
I opened it up it said, “Would you please be mine.”
I gave her flowers and some candy
She opened them up and said, “You're trying to
Make me fat.”

[chorus]
(now)
I just want a new girlfriend
I just want someone to make me laugh
I just want a new girlfriend
I just want someone to laugh at me
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/b/bowling+for+soup/valentino_20333311.html ]
Not to smart, not to tall,
Likes to watch tv and play basketball

I bought a car and let her drive it
She opened the door and said “ Oh bother, this is
Red.”
I gave her all my notes from algebra
She opened em up and said , “I can't believe you're
So stupid.”

I won't ever make her wash my car, NO!
I won't ever take a walk, not unless she's there
Oh, oh, oh, oh!