Me and my mates went out to the bar
Just to see who the drunken saps are
Pathetic little people to the left and right
We can't get blamed if they forget the night
After one round o' drinks I can pretty much tell
My mates are ready to raise some hell
They won't know what hit 'em when we run amok
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
The hipster crowd thinks it's safe to duck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
Look at those hicks from the pickup truck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
The pretty girls saw us and out they snuck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
Me and my mates were at a bar mitzvah
The open bar must have cost a little extra
In honor of entering his manhood
The big boy's guests were getting smashed up good
But before they could come out with the main entree
My mates decided to make 'em oy vey
We tried throwin' bagels and the bagels stuck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
We found some hummus and we launched that muck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
Saying mazel tov doesn't bring good luck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
If the kid complains we'll give him eighteen bucks
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
We went to a shindig with the bourgeoisie
The place was stuffy but the drinks were free
They looked at us funny when we started to cuss
What makes those pricks think they're better than us
While they sip glasses of wine and champagne
Me and my mates are goin' half insane
Tell the host that the hors d'ouvres suck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
The rich girls here could use a tummy tuck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
The quartet bassist doesn't know how to pluck
Spring it on 'em when they're drunk as fuck!
Police don't take well to being struck
They sprung 'em on us when we're drunk as fuck!
They sprung 'em on us when we're drunk as fuck!