Yo jeff what's up holmes Yo what's up prince Yo what's up man Ay wheres my car at Wheres your car why you asking me No I parked my car right here your standing here wheres my car I been ere for an hour and a half I ain't seen it Come on man stop playing jeff wheres my car at No I'm serious man it's not in my pocket I haven't seen your car Jeff wheres my car I parked my car right here man I don't know!
Now a joke is a joke and fun and games are chill But this isn't funny this is straight up ill Now there's a limit to humour and this is gone too far I ain't laughing no more y'all now who stole my car I don't know man
I don't know if y'all ever had a car stolen before But it's a real crazy feeling when you walk out the door And you don't need a map or any kind of chart That your standing in the spot where your car used to be parked Now you know you parked your car their but yet you keep looking Cause your mind didn't except yet that somebody took it So your scratching your head and trying to get things clear and there's always some idiot who says You sure you parked here To call the police would be the move that's smart But instead you keep looking where you know you didn't park Searching for reasons like maybe tickets you owed Something to justify that maybe it got towed But not stolen naa never forget it But then you ask yourself well where the hell is it If there was a prize you'd win dummy of the year Cause you looking somewhere else when you know you parked it here So to never never land you find yourself strolling And when you finally except that it's stolen You call the police and they come and say That's the 437th car stolen today As if that's something that he really needed to mention Then they start asking you real dumb questions like When's the last time that you saw it You idiot right before they stole it Now your mad this cop is talking to you And somebody's in your car heading to kalamazoo Officer fool or whoever you are can you please get off your butt and find who stole my car
I remember my first car never forget it A candy red apple irub windows be tinted Talk about fast like a rocket to drive When from zero to 60 in like 5 point 5 And matching red rims but that wasn't enough It had a ca phone for when I wanted to reach out and touch An alpine stereo that straight up rocked With 12 inch woofers you could hear for blocks The first day I got it I was fronting real hard I could hear people saying damn look at that car I was hyped and I wanted my friends to check it out So I went to the spot where they usually hangin out Just my luck nobody standing outside I really didn't feel like parking my ride So I honked my horn but nobody was coming I said what the heck I ran inside and left it running I was inside for 20 seconds that's all I found my friends and said you gotta check this out y'all But when we came back out the car wasn't there Man you ain't buy nothing I did I swear My friends went inside I was mad they didn't believe me Now I'm standing outside at the spot my car used to be It was hard to figure out what to do all alone But then I got it call the car phone
Fresh princes car Yo thief bring my car back now before I bust your Hold up wait a minute pal Seems like you kinda forgot the keys I thought man he's right well bring it back please Hello listen thief don't hang up Then luckily jeff pulled up I told him what had happened someone's stolen my car I said come on jeff lets get him he can't be far We rode around for about 20 minutes When we were just about to say forget it When I spotted him I said jeff go get it We pulled up behind him and man he jetted He was driving all wild and fast like he was getting points for the stuff that he crashed I called him on the car phone again and I said Of course you realise when I catch you your dead All through philly was a high speed chasin Dude was playing around like he thought we was racing A hundred miles an our and he lost control And slammed my car into a telephone pole I ran to the car I said man you okay He said yeah so I punched him in the face The cops came up as if it was my fault They say me punch dude and charged me with assault If his neck was closer I probably would have grabbed it He told the cops that I said he could have it I calmed down and they got things straight I saw half my car in seventh street the other half in eighth I wanna just jump in the ocean My car looked like it was a leggo explosion Why does life have to be so hard Don't laugh next time it could be your car