Dads gone down the dog track, Engels' laying cables Brothers with his student friends plotting in the stables They're preparing for power and how to win I'm covered in Solaire and preparing to swim "Old Iron! Old Iron!" - I heard the bobby shout As he brought his friendly truncheon down with with a God Almighty clout. Mothers playing bingo, she's hoping for a big win She buys the daily papers to see how 10% live My cousins' greatest wish, is to one day buy a farm And turn it into a health club with top people charm "Any evening, any day" - I'm singing to myself I'll pack up all my clothes and dough and piss off somewhere else.
My ol' man was a dust person until he got the shove Now the iron heel he talked about is backed by the iron glove Brothers bought new glasses, shaped like Leon Trotsky's They look very nice on the mantlepiece, next to the Royal family I'm laying back with the radio on, in time to hear the Archer's An everyday tale of country folk mixed up in prostitution.
Like all good stories with a happy end, which I'll now give to you Our cousins wish was granted and so his dream came true His gas shares doubled, while his telecoms soared Til he had enough money, to chair his own board And thank you Margaret Thatcher, "may you never come to harm" He now serves cocktails and lettuce at a Top Peoples Health Club Farm.