It was just like a dream, yeah, a surreal scene, like a blue orange
I thought my senses had gone, like I was writing a song about a foot-long
And she said, "hello, dear, it's my party
"so I hope you'll be smart, hee hee
And I said,"i don't know, but I think I'll go fix me a stiff drink"

Well, I sat there and stared, because at first I was scared of this female
And while she talked with the apes about champagne and grapes, I approached her
And she said,"now, now, don't try to leave me,
"it's unfair to deceive me
"i could kill if you try to escape me, come upstairs my friend"

Now I knew, I knew, I couldn't be that mean,
So I tried, yeah I really tried to leave her but she was a
Big, big, big, big girl, big girl

Hurled out the door, it was becoming more of a test of honour
Would I go, would I stay, could I do it all day and be a certain gonnor
And she said,"now you're so young and tender,
"and don't be concerned with my gender
It was hard but I managed to send her away up to those fluffy white clouds

It was hard on the brain but I would do it again for the satisfaction
She weighed 203 but that was ok by me, there was lots of action
And she said,"shall we dance in the moonlight
"it would be so nice on a june night
But I said,"if it's ok by you, I'll just sit here a take me a rest"
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The Mad, Mad Moonlight Lyrics

Steve Harley – The Mad, Mad Moonlight Lyrics