You’re a mean one Mr. Grinch You really are a heel. You're as cuddly as a cactus, And as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch! You're a bad banana, With a greasy black peel! You're a monster, Mr. Grinch! Your heart's an empty hole. Your brain is full of spiders. You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch! I wouldn't touch you With a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole! You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch! You have termites in your smile. You have all the tender sweetness Of a seasick crocodile, Mr. Grinch! Given the choice between the two of you, I'd take the seasick crocodile! You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch! You're a nasty, wasty skunk! Your heart is full of unwashed socks. Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch! The three words that best describe you Are as follows, and I quote, "Stink, stank, stunk!" You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch! You're the king of sinful sots! Your heart's a dead tomato, Splotched with moldy, purple spots, Mr. Grinch! Your soul is an apalling dump-heap, Overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, Mangled-up in tangled-up knots! You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch! With a nauseous super naus! You're a crooked jerky jockey, And you drive a crooked hoss, Mr. Grinch! You're a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich, With arsenic sauce!