(Derek Dick, Steve Rothery, Mark Kelly, Pete Trewavas, Ian Mosley, Brian Jelliman, Diz Minnitt)
Garden party held today Invites call the debs to play Social climbers polish ladders Wayward sons again have fathers "Hello, dad!", "Hello, dad!"
Edgy eggs and queuing cumbers Rudely wakened from their slumbers Time has come again for slaughter On the lawns by still "Cam" waters It's a slaughter, it's a slaughter
Champagne corks are firing at the sun again Swooping swallows chased by violins again Straafed by Strauss they sulk in crumbling eaves again Oh God not again!
Aperitifs consumed en masse display Their owners on the grass Couples loiter in the cloisters Social leeches quoting Chaucer Doctor's son a parson's daughter Where why not and should they oughta
Please don't lie upon the grass Unless accompanied by a fellow May I be so bold as to perhaps suggest Othello Punting on the Cam is jolly fun they say Beagling on the downs, oh please do come they say Rugger is the tops, a game for men they say They say, good God they say
I'm punting I'm beagling I'm wining Reclining I'm rucking I'm fucking So welcome It's a party
Angie chalks another blue Mother smiles she did it too Chitters chat and gossips lash Posers pose, pressmen flash, flash Smiles polluted with false charm Locking on to Royal arms Society columns now ensured Returns to mingle with the crowds Oh what a crowd
Oh, punting on the cam Oh please do come they say Beagling on the downs Oh please so come they say Garden party held today they say Oh please do come Oh please do come, they say