I got up at half past four
Forty-four robbers around my door
Forty-four - and maybe more
What the hell they want me for?
Stubbly faces & gap-tooth grins
Ain`t no way I`m lettin` them in
No way - you can`t come in
Forty-four robbers stinkin` of gin
Uh huh - I ain`t lettin` you in
I`ll hit you with a rolling pin
So small can`t hurt a fly
Get in my way and I`ll sure as hell try
To kick your butt down the block
Can`t wait yellin` for the cops
Fifty dealers and fifty thieves
Starring at the drive-in on my street
Shit, over my shoulder there`s Popeye and Bluto
Looking nasty - can I remember my judo?
It`s always like this - going out alone
So damn scared might never leave home
I`ve got my freedom I`ve got my pride
All means nothin` with these men outside
Puffing and preening and strutting their stuff
Blocking my way out - I`ve had enough!
Give me justice - hand it over now
Gotta get a gun or maybe just leave town...
Sly Stallone and Al Capone
Are giving me grief on the telephone
All I want is a Swiss cheese sarnie
When at the deli stands big Arnie
Hey Jean-Claude - move aside
That taxi`s mine - I`m taking that ride
When I go out to get the Sunday paper
What`s my man to think `someone might rape her`?!
I`m just having a beer on my own
Don`t mean Hulk Hogan can take me home
I`ve got my mace but my loud-as-fuck whistle
Is so ineffective I just pray the Epistles
For help to come someday soon
But until then I`ll stay in my room
Laika – 44 Robbers Lyrics