I'm Knox a famous surgeon And I earn my daily bread By studying cadavers Which are bodies not long dead One day two suave young gentlemen Appeared within my view I'm Mr Burke, I'm Mr Hare How do you do? These gents explained that their Acquaintance had just passed away It seemed the body'd only been A goner for a day Excuse the curious offer Said Hare or was it Burke? But would you care to slice this up To see how corpses work? Well it's always a palaver Getting hold of a cadaver So I said yes I'll ahve her Oh, it's a he!
This body taught me much about What makes a person poorly Why some men live to 99 And some die prematurely How these thing function perfectly And others won't repair How everything is, interlinked Oh what's that doing there?
'Til one day there was nothing left And all my work was spent Then Burke and Hare turned up again My, how convenient! Another slab of fresh Human organs, bone and flesh Another gory sesh, excellent news (Laughs evilly)
As time went on these kind men Brought me several guys and gals My lab was choca-block With all their freshly passed on pals I paid them lots of money Bodies came from everywhere U really are a busy Mr Burke And Mr Hare
They seemed such cultured gentlemen I never did suspect That Burke and Hare were not so nice I really should have checked Then one day a policeman came Asked if I've seen a chap I hadn't, but days later His corpses turned up in my lap
It seemed that these acquaintances Of Burke and Hare actually Were not their friends and Did not always die naturally Burke and Hare had murdered them It was plain to see Then brought the corpses to my lab And pocketed the fee
The two men were arrested But one of them set free Poor Burke was hanged But happily his corpse was sent to me Oh bit wiffy! Still much to learn