I remember sayin' I don't care either way Just as long as he or she is healthy I'm okay Then the doctor pointed to the corner of the screen And said "Ya see that thing right there, well you know what that means"
And I started wondering who he was going to be And I thought heaven help us if he's anything like me He'll probably climb a tree to tall and ride his bike too fast End up every summer wearin' something in a cast He's gonna throw a ball and break some glass, in a window down the street He's gonna get in trouble, he's gonna get in fights I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my payback, if he's anything like me
I can see him right now, knees all skinned up With a magnifying glass tryin' to melt a Tonka truck Won't he be a sight with his football helmet on That'll be his first love til his first love comes along He'll get his heart broke by the time he's in his teens And heaven help him if he's anything like me
He'll probably stay out too late and drive his car too fast Get a speeding ticket he'll pay for mowing grass He's gonna get caught skippin' class and be grounded for a week He's gonna get in trouble, we're gonna get in fights I'm gonna lose my temper and some sleep It's safe to say that I'm gonna get my payback, if he's anything like me
He's gonna love me and hate me along the way Years are gonna fly by, I already dread the day He's gonna hug his momma, he's gonna shake my hand He's gonna act like he can't wait to leave But as he drives out, he'll cry his eyes out If he's anything like me There's worse folks to be like Aw he'll be alright, if he's anything like me