Hey, mom and dad i'm a real dick and i hope you know that
Hey, mom and dad i'm a piece of shit and i hope you know that
Hey, mom and dad i'm a real bitch and i hope you know that
Hey, mom and dad i'm a real... dick, dick
Hey, samuel i'm a real fuck and i hope you know that
Hey, charlie i'm a real wuss and i hope you know that
Hey, caroline i'm a real puss and i hope you know that
Hey, pierce i'm a real cock and i hope you know that
Hey, rachel i'm real sissy ass clown and i hope you know that
Hey, everyone i'm a real sucker and i hope you know that
Hey, extended family i suck a lot of dick
Hey, everybody at school i'm a total piece of shit
Hey, everyone who I didn't mention, fuck me
Hey, everybody i love, fuck me, yeah