Bo BurnhamBinary Reality

We live in a binary reality, we do It's a world of black and white There's only two types of people in this world: Those who can finish lists What is art? You know, what is art? Is art something gay people do to get back at their fathers? Could be What is an artist? What makes a great artist? You know, great artists like myself Like the great director Michael Bay Like the great Irish actor Shaquille O'Neal We ask questions You know, questions nobody else dares to ask Questions like Where are all the Sour Patch Parents? Questions like if Mickey's a mouse, and Minnie's a mouse, and Donald's a duck, and Daisy and Goofy, if they're all animals and they can talk Why is Pluto just a fucking dog? Did they just forget to anthropomorphize him or worse, is Mickey keeping him mentally handicapped to stay a pet? I'm not, how does that fit in to that universe, that paradigm Goofy's a dog, he's talking This one, crawling around Guys, you got tight, I would never bash Disney Never Ever I think Disney teaches girls Young girls such important lessons that princess fairy tales, you know like Cinderella: It doesn't matter where you come from or how poor you are, you know, as long as you're incredibly hot Snow White: Which encourages children to You know, give midgets nicknames Sleeping Beauty: You know, which encourages, um Date rape, maybe not Maybe not that one I was doing a show recently on the border of, uh, Hannah Montana and South Dakota Fanning And after the show After the show, a guy came up to me And said, "Bo, why don't you ever tell stories on-stage about people coming up to you after the shows?" And I said, "'Cause they're never funny" I've always wanted a black girlfriend Not as, you know, 'cause like I don't know, h-how, how do I put this? When we 69, I can call it "yin yanging" Um It's not a, it's not racist Guys, it's 21st century racism It's racism in light of itself The only reason I'm saying these things Is because the stigmas about race are already there And I'm just playing off of that And they understand that So if after the show You see like a black guy beating me up He's doing it ironically, okay? Get your story straight © 2019