All my friends got herpes in Montreal
All my friends don't open their mouths at all
All my friends don't answer when I call
All my friends make money, after all
I gave conjunctivitis to my guitar
I gave conjunctivitis to my avatar
I gave conjunctivitis to a girl in a bar
I gave conjunctivitis like a star
And she's laughin' at me in a bathroom stall
And she's laughin' at me in Montreal
Mmmmhmmm
Mmmmhmmm