What do you want from life To kidnap an heiress or threaten her with a knife What do you want from life To get cable TV and watch it every night
There you sit a lump in your chair Where do you sleep and what do you wear when you're sleeping
What do you want from life An Indian guru to show you the inner light What do you want from life a meaningless love affair with a girl that you met tonight
How can you tell when you're doin' alright Does your bank account swell While you're dreaming at night How do know when you're really in love Do violins play when you're touching the one That you're loving
What do you want from life Someone to love and somebody that you can trust What do you want from life To try and be happy while you do the nasty things you must
Well, you can't have that, but if you're an American citizen you are entitled to: a heated kidney shaped pool, a microwave oven--don't watch the food cook, a Dyna-Gym--I'll personally demonstrate it in the privacy of your own home, a kingsize Titanic unsinkable Molly Brown waterbed with polybendum, a foolproof plan and an airtight alibi, real simulated Indian jewelry, a Gucci shoetree, a year's supply of antibiotics, a personally autographed picture of Randy Mantooth and Bob Dylan's new unlisted phone number, a beautifully restored 3rd Reich swizzle stick, Rosemary's baby, a dream date in kneepads with Paul Williams, a new Matador, a new mastadon, a Maverick, a Mustang, a Montego, a Merc Montclair, a Mark IV, a meteor, a Mercedes, an MG, or a Malibu, a Mort Moriarty, a Maserati, a Mac truck, a Mazda, a new Monza, or a moped, a Winnebago--Hell, a herd of Winnebago's we're giving 'em away, or how about a McCulloch chainsaw, a Las Vegas wedding, a Mexican divorce, a solid gold Kama Sutra coffee pot, or a baby's arm holding an apple?