I sat at the door of the pearly gates
I tried to wait
Oooh oh
You don't know who I am or why I am
Why don't you understand
That this blackness hurts
That when I close my eyes it's worse
That's why I go to sleep
To black out, I pass out from doubt
Oooh ohh
I don't want to know why the sky goes blue
Then the sun is the moon
And everything looks so dark in this room
So I go to sleep
Till I'm deceased
I want you to care just say you'll be there
When I fall
Someday I will handle it all
But when I drop the ball
I keep saying I saw
The world as a girl, as a mountain, as a stone
But I'm alone
I've seen a tornado fall from the sky
I've seen a fire break down and die
I've seen the clouds take form
I've seen my whole damn life reborn
I built this wall
I want it to fall
I wanna know my name
But I didn't want to know it all
I gotta family, but god damn
They never really did understand me
They put this front
Only to tell you what they want
So I built up a small wall for two
And I thought the other part of the wall, was for you
In this small town, there's only one horse
And I need out so I made my own course
I've been unhappy and I've met it's course
I want you to know I was just looking for more
And I've know your hate, held onto it as weight
I let you bite me then walk over my fate
I've let the ants hold me down
When all I could hear was a single sound
My sisters bitter
Put me to blame
Cuz it took too long for me to change
I built this small wooden box for the rain
So when it all falls down it's all the same
As I knew you
Every color in the past grows bold
The more I know, the more I grow
Someday I will show
You what it all means
But today I won't
But today I won't
Noo
So say goodbye
To the bad guy
To every bad thought
To every last stop
I will never drop
So when I close my eyes
Just let me be
Don't let them take that part of me
And then I can wake up...
And then I can wake up...
And then I can wake up...