Adam SandlerThe Mayor Of Pussytown

Yo it's 2004 and all you candy asses thinkin ya'll real pussies Ya'll ain't seen shit yet Eh yo man let em know Oh yeah, guess who's back It's the mother fuckin pussy with the little nutsack Don't care about cheddar or the paper chase I'm a fuckin grown man with zits on my face A straight up chicken shit A pansy ass punk If I'm if I'm guarding your ass it's an automatic slam dunk While thugs are at the party bustin all ya'lls asses I'm hidin in the corner wonderin where the fuck's my glasses Can't afford no rims my My fuckin dick's so small no bitch can suck it I don't pop 9's I got weak rhymes Back in 9 duce I got pissed on 10 times I roll solo I ain't got no clue I said please don't hit me more than a cow says moo Afraid of heights I'm a-scared in the dark I walk an extra 3 miles to avoid crazy fucks in the park Denied by the bloods, turned down by the crypts My fuckin auntie kicked my ass and she got 2 plastic hips When I step to the club feel free to stare me down Because I just got re-elected the mayor of pussytown May-or-of-pus-sy-town When bangers hit the street I stay home and watch tv Slumped out on the couch so no one can see Unless I hear somebody knockin on my door Then you'll see me crawlin cross the mother fuckin floor I've been a fuckin coward every day of my life, That's why I pretend I don't know everyone's banging my wife I won't sit on the porch, I don't want no trouble I'm more afraid of goin out than the fuckin boy in a bubble When the shit goes down I make a break so fast Look like a mother fuckin rocket goin past Searchin for the sneakiest place to hide Straight into the ladies room, ain't got no pride Slippin slidin, runnin hidin You know damn well it's a scooter I'm ridin Oh no here we go, out come the glocks I take off so fast I pop out my socks You gonna fuck with me, i'll cry then run I called the cops when I got shot with a fuckin squirt gun He clams up he shuts down His pants he almost s***s He'll even look the other way if you grab his grandma's tits Well I had a little poodle but neighbor's stoled her I'd shoot her with an ak but the kick hurts my shoulder I can't pop no gun and I can't fist fight Hell I'm afraid to take out the fuckin garbage at night I use the steps in the pool cause I'm terrified to dive Don't fuck with my floaties they's whats keepin me alive, bitch Never drank remy never delt crack One time I smoked weed I had a panic attack If you're looking for my dick in the mens locker room Just bring your binoculars with a fuckin super zoom Naw I'm just playin I don't fuckin change in there The one time I did got my bush sprayed off with nair But did I stick up for myself no fuckin doubt I did what I do best, I broke the fuck out I ain't lookin at you I ain't tryin to front It's aight with me you called my jimmy a c*** Freakin sneakin crawlin creepin When the gangs are bangin I'm in the basement sleepin I'm straight from the streets seen trouble in every side When the shit hits the fan I throw on a fuckin disguise Fake nose fake wig fake beard It all worked pretty good Sometimes I just use a map and a funny accent And pretend I got lost in the hood mother fucker Now all you coward mother fuckers out there Walkin round with your head hangin low Just cause you ate one dick Just know My man the mayor, had to suck off his whole high school Case closed May-or-of-pus-sy-town
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