And if one day I should become
A singer with a spanish bum
Who sings for women of great virtue
Id sing to them with a guitar
I borrowed from a coffee bar
Well, what you don't know doesn't hurt you
My name would be antonio
And all my bridges I would burn
And when I gave them some theyd know
Id expect something in return
Id have to get drunk every night
And talk about virility
With some old grandmother
That might be decked out like a christmas tree
And no pink elephant Id see
Though Id be drunk as I could be
Still I would sing my song to me
About the time they called me jacky
If I could be for only an hour
If I could be for an hour every day
If I could be for just one little hour
Cute in a stupid ass way
And if I joined the social whirl
Became procurer of young girls
Then I could have my own bordellos
My record would be number one
And Id sell records by the ton
All sung by many other fellows
My name would then be handsome jack
And Id sell boats of opium
Whisky that came from twickenham
Authentic queens
And phoney virgins
Id have a bank on every finger
A finger in every country
And every country ruled by me
Id still know where Id want to be
Locked up inside my opium den
Surrounded by some china men
Id sing the song that I sang then
About the time they called me jacky
If I could be for only an hour
If I could be for an hour every day
If I could be for just one little hour
Cute in a stupid ass way
Now, tell me, wouldnt it be nice
That if one day in paradise
Id sing for all the ladies up there
And they would sing along with me
And we be so happy there to be
Cos down below is really nowhere
My name would then be jupiter
Then I would know where I was going
Become all knowing
My beard so very long and flowing
If I could play deaf, dumb and blind
Because I pitied all mankind
And broke my heart to make things right
I know that every single night
When my angelic work was through
The angels and the devil too
Could sing my childhood song to me
About the time they called me jacky
If I could be for only an hour
If I could be for an hour every day
If I could be for just one little hour
Cute in a stupid ass way
