Get a letter, can you open it?
Without tearing what's inside of it?
Good news: Checks
Bad news: Bills
Cutting through paper
I know scissors make it tough
I can show you other stuff
There are ways of cutting through
You didn't know but now you do
Good news: check
Bad news: Bills
...Letter opener
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsfreak.com/d/daiquiri/letter+opener_20247166.html ]